You Can Call Me, Al
Race pimps of the world unite! You have nothing to lose but your paychecks! Al Sharpton is coming to town! Joy! Rapture! Divinity!
I normally don’t get this excited, but when I heard Wednesday afternoon that the Rev. Al Sharpton was coming to Indianapolis on July 11 to talk about the Brandon Johnson case, I haven’t been this giddy since my wife came home with Victoria Secret, a bottle of scotch and two Cohiba cigars.
Al Sharpton, ladies and gentlemen! Al Sharpton! The man who brought you the Tawana Brawley case. The man who ran for President in 2000. The man whose hair and rhetoric have been out of style since 1974 is coming to Indy. I heard a while back that some local activists were trying to get him to come here and speak on the Johnson case, so his impending arrival means the check must have cleared.
Al’s visit gives me a lot to ponder; like where will be staying? Will he reside at at the Conrad or the lovely overnight accommodations at the Baymont Inn at 23rd and Post Road? Will he lay his head on the 9th floor of the Columbia Club or partake of the continental breakfast at the Motel 6 at 21st and Shadeland? Decisions, decisions.
But despite the numerous accommodations in the hood that Al likely won’t be staying in, I do wonder what he will talk about? Will he talk about the high dropout rate of black students? Will he talk about the disproportionate high rate of out of wedlock births in the black community? Will he talk about the high rate of obesity and diabetes in the black community due to poor health and diet? Probably not. Brandon Johnson is pretty low hanging fruit and Al has never been known to be an intellectual heavyweight.
However, he does a good song and dance and I for one will be looking forward to his Sunday night performance. After all, as one good friend of mine told me, who wants to go hear a self-absorbed guy constantly bombard anyone who will listen with his personal opinions on anything and everything! How can I say no to that and still be Abdul?!
Here’s the news release regarding Al’s impending arrival…